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Sunday, December 03, 2006

Jackie is a cook at my workplace. Unfortunately for me, he also happens to be an idiot.

There was once a smart man who said that, "For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction". However, he forgot that there are idiots in this world, thus neglecting to mention that when an action is committed towards an idiot, the reaction is inversely proportional.

Today at work, I happened to pick up a small piece of tomato and threw it at Jackie. A smart person would have picked up something non-lethal like a shred of chicken or a crouton and threw it back. But we're talking about an idiot here, so guess what he threw at me. Made your guess yet? After throwing that little piece of tomato at him and scoring a head-shot, he comes out from behind the stove area, and throws a small, but incredibly sharp paring knife at me (or rather, my foot). Apparently he was aiming for the empty space between my feet, but somehow the knife stuck itself to the right of my left heel. I was shocked, I moved one step, and it fell out, bloodless. Took another step, and blood started dripping out. Damnit.

It helped that Jackie thought smart and got me plasters and disinfectant immediately, plus napkins to dry the blood up. Long story short, I thought that the plasters and disinfectant helped, when all of a sudden the guy I was training as a food-runner told me that my foot was red. The shock when I looked down and saw my foot covered in blood. They say you'd never feel pain until you realise that you're injured, but this was ridiculous - a wound only 5mm in length bleeding like a prize-fighter who got his teeth knocked out. It must have hit some small veins and nerves, because not only was I bleeding, I was hurting like hell and my left foot was immobile and couldn't bend. I didn't want to get Jackie into trouble, because after all, I started the problem by throwing stuff at him, so I excused myself and went to the toilet to wash my Croc sandals and clean up my blood-sticky foot.

God knows how, after changing 2 plasters until after cleaning up and going back to work, it starts bleeding again. This time noticed by the F&B manager, Wonder Hing, whom I call "Wondering" (Don't know why her parents called her that). She asked why I was limping, and I told her it was a sprain. Then while walking past her, she looked at my foot and said "But it's bleeding rather badly". God knows the shock I had. I quickly went to the storeroom and locked myself in and cleaned up the wound again. It still bled after that, but I couldn't give a flying fuck because it was getting busy and the bastard Exec. Chef E kept coming out to make comments about what we were doing, frequently rearranging the trays until orders got mixed up. Thank God he didn't notice my bleeding foot, or else heads would have rolled. My leg felt numb throughout, and I had to wash my Crocs 4 times to get rid of the sticky blood. And I also thank God that the bleeding stopped after I ended work, enough so that I could cycle home. I really thank God that I could at least make it home despite the pain and numbness in my leg. Hopefully the wound doesn't get infected. It's still numb.

And I want to say that, even though Jackie's an idiot, he's still a good friend, and that without idiots in my life, it'd be pretty damn boring, albeit painful and numb.

Kenny died at 2:21 am