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Saturday, April 07, 2007

I've only known her for 1 month before getting romantically invovled with her. I've been in a relationship with her for 3 months, ending February. I haven't seen her for almost 2 months. She's been gone for such a short while, yet somehow it feels like it's been years since I've last seen her. When I think of her, I can't help but miss her. When I miss her, I can't help but be miserable. When I'm miserable, I know I'm without her. When I know I'm without her, I know I do love her.

I know I sound like a whiny little bitch, probably like those jack-holes who make police reports about people who flame them. I can almost hear my friends shouting "Dump that stupid broad!". It must be karma. Previous girlfriends were told by their friends to give up on me, but they still persisted on, and I ended up breaking their hearts. I guess it's now my turn to experience the hurt I've dealt.

I don't know why I love this girl so. I don't know why. I can go on dates with other girls (yeah I know I'm being a bastard), but when I get home at night, I can't shake the feeling that I've done something morally wrong. I haven't talked to her in weeks, I haven't seen her smile. All I've got is a picture of her in my wallet. She's smiling, and it melts and cracks my heart in 2 knowing that she's not around. It feels like Global Warming deep down in my chest. Polar ice caps melting and cracking.

But I'm slowly growing stronger, the hurt's no longer there; the cracks are mending well. I guess I can get along without her around, no matter how much it pains me that she's not around. Silently I pray, that she's still safe. I hope to see her again soon.

Kenny died at 12:04 am