Cookie!

Saturday, April 28, 2007

It's April 28th. Gee, I wonder, it's so long since I've last saw her. Her cellphone's constantly switched off. I don't know what she's up to. People keep telling me to get a new girlfriend. I wonder if I should, and I know what many people would say about that. "Two's enough already! Stop it man!"

Right-o! I don't have the financial capabilities to support that many. I wonder what Gu Yu's doing right now. I can't seem to forget about her. My bad for not treating her right when she was still around. Like that song one song I've heard before that goes something like "I believe that you don't know what you've got until you've said goodbye". "Affirmation" by Savage Garden. It's such an old song, but that one line always gets stuck in my head. It always reminds me of the stuff I did to deserve what I'm going through now.

Life isn't fair, most people say. But what's fair? You do stuff that your parents probably wouldn't condone, and then rant and rave about how the world's so unfair. I wonder if people out there really took a look at themselves and thought "Hey, I think I do deserve the shit I'm going through right now". It's pride that makes people not see where their faults lie. And no matter whom it is, they still have the pride hidden deep inside that denies what they've ever done wrong. I'd say that that's a complex idea, because even though I admit to my faults and that I do deserve what I'm getting now, I still take alot of pride in myself knowing what I know about it. It's a vicious cycle. Damn.

I sometimes ask myself out loud"WHY ME?", and then I hear a reply that booms back at me "IF NOT YOU, THEN WHOM?" And I stand by the age old tradition of "Stupid questions get redundant answers".

Now, I wish upon my star, or any star, that she'll come back soon. I do miss her. I'm not used to showing any emotion at all, but for her, the girl who stole my heart, Gu Yu, I'll do so. I miss you, Gu Yu. I wish you'd come back soon.

Kenny died at 1:20 am